Saturday, April 25, 2009


I told myself for days that I would blog today. So, here I am. Yes, you might recognize the title from just a few short weeks ago. Wait. How can you use the same title twice? Not sure, but since it’s my blog, I can and will. I used the number for the first one, so today I will use the word for this one.

Defining moments.
Stop. Think about them for a second. Defining moments are those moments in our lives that define who we are as individuals. There are those that we can control and then there are those that happen with absolutely no control that are just thrust upon us. When we are born, our parents make all of our defining moments for us. Then, as we age, we have much more control in how or what defines us. Our relationships, college, having a baby, your job choice… those are just a few. How about the ones we can’t control? How someone treats us, an accident, a sickness, the outcome of a game, a death. All of those things easily play a vital role in who we are as individuals.

So here I sit. Reflecting on one of the biggest defining moments in my life that I had no control over. It changed who I am forever. No, I didn’t just wake up one day and say, “Hey, I am going to change who I am today.” It just happened. Don’t ask me how; I can’t even begin to explain it. Fortunately, it was for the positive.

What is it you probably wondering. The death of my brother. Five years ago today. We were night and day, but had that bond you can only have as immediate family. One only brothers and sisters can share. You know, even though we didn’t talk on a regular basis, we had that connection. We had lived through many of the same experiences growing up as kids. We shared a few of the same friends. There were the tough times and there were the great times. Gosh, we fought like, well, only as brothers could fight. Today, I’d do anything to have just one more fight, one more moment, good or bad. Just one more moment.

Speed of life.
Someone told me just the other day, “Slow down and enjoy life. Its not only the scenery you miss by going too fast – you also miss the sense of where you are going and why.” In this day and age, we are constantly on the go. Technology allows us to live our lives at world record speed, never slowing down for a moment to embrace things. Where does this fit into today’s blog. It’s easy. Think about it. We sit at work, count down the seconds until 5:00 or the number of days until the weekend. Or, how about hoping the days go by quickly until you get to a day where you have something exciting planned. What about all that time in between? You know; the time you’re wishing away so quickly. I think about this often and would do anything to have some of those days, minutes, or even seconds back that I had wished away so quickly. Though I think about it, I still wish time away; time that I can never get back.

The Question
I have finally learned in life that there are some things that I will never understand, but I will still wonder anyways. I think its human nature to always try and understand. To figure things out. Here is one of the questions I ask often ask myself and I know that I will never have the answer. Actually, it’s a question I ask, but prompted by lyrics to a song. Dr. Dre – The Message.

A message to God.
Since you finishin em early, what possessed you to start him?

Well, my thoughts seem scattered today and my flow weak, so I will just leave you with this.

I would give up anything in this world to have a few seconds left with my brother, just to tell him I loved him.

R.I.P. Bruce.


  1. Thinkin' about you lots today, Glenn. Love to you on what I know is a very difficult day.

  2. I have been thinking about you this weekend. Hope you are doing okay. I hope you are keeping yourself busy. Hugs to you.

  3. Wow. Sending you hugs, man. Inspiring post.

  4. I'm so sorry for your past loss & the fresh pain you're feeling right now.
    Glenn, knowing the kind of person you are, I can almost GUARANTEE your brother knew you loved him.
    HUGS to you, my friend.

  5. I thought about you a lot this weekend. I know that 5 years ago you and your family went through a very hard time. Try to remember the good times, and know that your brother knew that you loved him. I know he would be proud of the man that you are today.

  6. I still hear your brothers voice in my head when I am around certain company. As you know it took me some time to talk to you about this and as I type this it is still tough on me. Bruce will always be around in one way or another. Jerry Dekat